Have you all forgotten about me? I’m still alive. Working a lot, as usual.

Just a piece moving forward: I will be moving into an apartment in Mt. Washington mid-August and my blogging will be on hold until I get settled. Lots has occurred over the past few weeks, and I will reserve comment only stating that my once-perceived rock(s) Ambrose and Jared, are no longer in my life.

I’m not talking about it much with anyone, yet the picture of Ambrose remains at my desk.

I am happy, despite the aforementioned. I am solid. But Ambrose saw me through where I am now, but I have re-discovered I am what I need most. I am also happy to say I am thankful for this transition period. I cannot type this entry without tears in my eyes and hope in my heart. I will miss what I thought I had, but Ambrose reminded me I can get through it on my own… He just made it easier with his head on my lap (or chewing the couch to center me)

Mary training has stopped. The blog will probably go in a different direction when I start back over.

I can’t wait to show you all, if you are still here.

I will be taking a short blogging break if you hadn’t already noticed.  I will be back to regular blogging sometime in the future—perhaps at the end of the month.  I hope you all understand.  There are some work/life/play balance issues I am attempting to achieve and though I try to allow the blog my attempt at demonstrating those things, I need to work through those.

 

I look forward to coming back, full steam, in the near future!

Someday, I will own this house.  In fact, this picture (courtesy of Google Maps) doesn’t do this home justice.  It has been completely restored and is probably worth its weight in gold.  Add the amazing view, and you have my dream home.  A fully rehabilitated Victorian home atop Mount Washington.  I would run everyday at the dawn of the morning and in the summers, I would sit on my second-floor deck drinking coffee everyday.  Yes.  That will be my life after I go back to school to become a doctor and practice some obscure type of medicine that I get paid $5,000/hour for after I win the lottery.

 

Mt. Washington is hilly along Grandview, but I tackled it and even ran down and up PJ McArdle Roadway.  Of course, running down PJ McArdle is pretty easy (7:00/mi) but you turn around and realize you have a nice steep slope to ascend.  I ran up it at a 10:00/mile pace stopping for a few seconds here and there because, well, it’s tough.  I was done with 4.5 miles by 7:00 AM and was not happier.

 

Running Mt. Washington.  My new favorite running spot.  (shhh!)  In fact, I passed no other runners (bizzare) but a few early morning tourists snapping pictures. 

Well, apparently I have been having trouble sleeping.  In fact, I would not have known I have been having nightmares (or night terrors) about work if it weren’t for Jared telling me this morning that I “woke up” screaming about work and when he went to give me a hug, I just said “You wouldn’t know, you don’t work there”.  Granted I remember nothing that happened last night, but apparently I was “ awake and conscious” but I can swear otherwise.

Probably not the healthiest confession for a blog, huh?

I know when I get really stressed out because I sleep horribly and I don’t spring out of bed when the alarm goes off.  That happened last night.  I decided to call it a day and take Friday off.  I do have to work Saturday so why not?  Apparently I was also screaming about that in my sleep too.  I ended up doing a lot of work via phone, so I guess I wasn’t really off.  In fact, I was talking to one of my bosses who said Whitney, this is your well deserved mental health day.  Stop talking about work, stop working, the town will be there Monday.  I guess that’s true. 

It’s tough for me, especially right now, because I care so much about the work I do (though when you are technically a trained social worker—more on that another time), I care because my name is on the work, that it’s difficult to stop working.  Also, this really is a full-life job.  This job doesn’t end when the business day ends. 

Total hours worked this week: 60.  That’s not really tough but it is thankless considering what I have gone though. 

Jared said I should ask Council that, if I work a week like this, I am granted the opportunity to work from home one of those days.  I like the idea, but I know them well enough that it will get knocked down.  Their whole reservation is we do it* too, so we have no sympathy for you.  It being the long hours.  I don’t mind putting in the long hours, but, come Friday, my brain is fried. 

 

Good news (?):  I got called back for Round Two of the job interview outside Philly.  Funny this should come up the day these terrors occur.  The week I was berated publically.  Sounds too good to be true.  Seriously.  Ship me away 600 miles.  Please & Thank you.

Other News:  I am in the process of renewing my contract with the Borough.  I am an at will employee which makes contract negotiations that much more important.  The only enforceable provision is severance.  Due to the tumultuous nature of past managers in my municipality, I have pretty much asked for severance for every termination scenario (aside from my gross negligence).  I didn’t ask for a “strong majority” vote for termination 6 months after an election (when new members try to vote-out management).  I’ve weathered that political storm these past few months.  If they terminate me, by law, I am allowed one (1) name-clearing hearing (yes, such a thing exists) and will move-on.  I don’t think it will get to that, but I do think I need to protect myself. 

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Last weekend, I did get some good runs in.  I always enjoy the summertime outside runs.  They are peaceful.  I also, singlehandedly, managed to get a CVS deal “done” and we can look forward to some new construction in the Borough.  Hustling ain’t easy.    Actually, the idea came from a broader elected official, and I made it happen that day.  I told the broker I charge commission. 

 

Happy Saturday?

Last night was the first public meeting since the flash flood.  What is generally a quick public meeting where a few residents show up and the Borough business gets acted on in a timely fashion became a gathering of hurt, scared, and angry residents. 

Residents wanted answers to a long-term solution.  We don’t have those answers yet.

Residents also heard lots of rumors, many of which aren’t substantiated.

Residents wanted to put the blame on someone.  It quickly became evident that person was me.  Three women got up and publicly berated me.  I’ve gone through that process before with the delinquent sewage, but it was “easier” because, well, let’s face it, it was an unpaid bill.

This felt a little different.  This felt worse because I know I have been working hard to try to help these residents. 

Council, thankfully, realized what was going on.  I didn’t attempt to correct their lies, I just sat there and took it. 

It’s a tough balance for me, really, because this is one of those times that I really feel that all of the hard work I do for the Borough will never be good enough.

I can’t imagine their pain.  Nor have I experienced flooding myself—my dad always said to live on the high side.  I also can’t imagine what would have driven them to pit the blame on me like this.  I’m becoming increasingly resilient, though.  That is for sure.

It should also be noted that the three residents that seemed to “rally” the crowed in their accusations against me were women.  I’ve had dealings with two of these women in the past.  I don’t know if there is any correlation or comment to be made regarding women’s treatment of women, but I could gather that.

It’s not the hours that make this a tough position (though, I didn’t get home last night until well after 10:00 PM).  It’s not the limited budget.  It’s times like these, where historical problems cannot be solved over night.  It’s times like these where I realize how hard my position is.  And how the residents look to me to truly solve all of the problems. 

Work this week is going to be hectic, speaking of hours:

Monday: 7A-10:30 PM (public meeting)

Tuesday: 7A-8:00 PM (planning commission)

Wednesday: 7A-8:00 PM (interviews)

Thursday: 7A-6:00 PM (misc. catch-up)

Friday: Normal hours (hopefully)

Saturday: 8A-?? (LERTA meeting)